“Learn a little about the man and I guarantee you will look at his art differently,” I said that, and I genuinely believe that this applies to any artist, woman or man. I hope that as you have read my posts you have gained some insight into what will inspire, originate, colour, shape and drive my works. Thus far I have shared with you my immediate situation: the preparation for my upcoming performance art piece and the accompanying trials and stress. I have also given you a window into the terrible, devastating heartbreak and humiliation I have suffered this year, and my rebuilding of my life. Although my writings are a form of catharsis for me, and have always been since a very young age, it has also been, to a certain extent, my intention to allow you that insight that I spoke of.
I have shared some of my experiences in the military, the scars of which I still bear. South Africa is a society which includes an entire generation of men, both black and white, bearing these scars. These men, in their 40’s and 50’s, military veterans from both the South African Defence Force as well as uMkhonto we Sizwe (the spear of the nation – the ANC’s armed wing) are ticking time-bombs, and are perhaps reflected, I think, by the violence we see in South Africa today. The reality is that even the 52 year old man you see working on a road crew, or the 47 year old who works in a bank, who may not have seen any action during his military service, has nevertheless been exposed to a world of violence that most people neither ever see nor experience in their lives. The primal, base Beast within as been uncovered and prodded until it stirs balefully. He has become a weapon left unattended, an explosive device which, if acted upon or treated with careless disregard, will result in catastrophic consequences. Some embrace this dark id that has been released from its box and utilise their acquired skills to rob, maim and kill. All countries have crime and criminal elements; South Africa’s crime however is accompanied by a level of violence that is truly appalling. This is in part due to a society which has had to assimilate a large body of men who have been trained to maim, to kill, to destroy, men who have never received counselling or guidance on how to deal with the beast that has been let loose within their psyche.
I have also shared with you the years immediately following my military service,as well as some of my childhood memories, and some of my idiosyncrasies and likes and dislike, my quirks if you will. AND… I still have novels full of tales and experiences to share with you so I hope you will bear with me as I unload and unburden myself on the pages of my site. At the very least I hope you find them entertaining and that they will inform you a little when you gaze upon some of my creations which I too will share.
A poet looks at the world as a man looks at a woman. ~ Wallace Stevens (I believe all artists do, I certainly do)